In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
