YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
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