I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
