Whod you bang
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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