my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
