Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
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