Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.

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(516): Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid. http://tfl.nu/hcvk

Replies (47) Good night (5312) Bad night (864)
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(713): View more from Texas

eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"

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(713): eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae" http://tfl.nu/afr2

Replies (7) Good night (861) Bad night (3440)
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(858): View more from California

Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.

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(858): Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life. http://tfl.nu/3r58

Replies (32) Good night (5098) Bad night (707)
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(630): View more from Illinois

Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?

(1-630): View more from Illinois

did you know it's going to storm tonight?

(630): View more from Illinois

You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.

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(630): Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister? (1-630): did you know it's going to storm tonight? (630): You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser. http://tfl.nu/f4jc

Replies (15) Good night (3818) Bad night (1010)
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(303): View more from Colorado

I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm

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(303): I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm http://tfl.nu/jf8q

Replies (16) Good night (782) Bad night (4976)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man

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(215): we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man http://tfl.nu/tkk9

Replies (29) Good night (9045) Bad night (1322)
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(210): View more from Texas

I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too

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(210): I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too http://tfl.nu/8tiw

Replies (10) Good night (7546) Bad night (989)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.

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(336): Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy. http://tfl.nu/6oi3

Replies (3) Good night (2894) Bad night (1088)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.

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(443): Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion. http://tfl.nu/xb4s

Replies (7) Good night (1240) Bad night (2582)
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(516): View more from New York

I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.

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(516): I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great. http://tfl.nu/3h0i

Replies (14) Good night (2895) Bad night (861)
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(775): View more from Nevada

you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.

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(775): you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is. http://tfl.nu/hp0z

Replies (6) Good night (1435) Bad night (673)
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(740): View more from Ohio

I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas

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(740): I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas http://tfl.nu/8zhl

Replies (3) Good night (2065) Bad night (786)
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(301): View more from Maryland

He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy

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(301): He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy http://tfl.nu/agcj

Replies (2) Good night (682) Bad night (442)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long

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(601): Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long http://tfl.nu/yjw4

Replies (6) Good night (582) Bad night (403)
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(850): View more from Florida

Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup

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(850): Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup http://tfl.nu/s0yj

Replies (1) Good night (483) Bad night (286)

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