I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I have feelings that need drinking.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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