If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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