You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Randomize
