& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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