Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
the liver wants what the liver wants
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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