How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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