i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Four minutes until I can fart!
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
