just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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