can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
false alarm, still single
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize