She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize