nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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