Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
