is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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