so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
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I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
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We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
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