How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I need a beard to bite.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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