We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize