if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
