You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
