I heard we made out
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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