My underwear smells like fireworks.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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