So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
