all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
