i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
