Texts From Last Night

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  (+44): View more from England

  Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.

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  (+44): Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call. http://tfl.nu/fjfe
  Replies (35) Good night (4557) Bad night (663)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.

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  (303): I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete. http://tfl.nu/q4l5
  Replies (19) Good night (4820) Bad night (1318)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.

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  (708): Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected. http://tfl.nu/ilck
  Replies (53) Good night (1385) Bad night (10954)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"

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  (847): And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!" http://tfl.nu/eczk
  Replies (5) Good night (3942) Bad night (1009)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...

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  (978): you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool... http://tfl.nu/os9w
  Replies (14) Good night (5180) Bad night (1707)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.

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  (570): I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me. http://tfl.nu/e3cl
  Replies (33) Good night (1032) Bad night (5157)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.

  (1-985): View more from Louisiana

  Do I have a choice?

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.

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  (985): Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response. (1-985): Do I have a choice? (985): I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again. http://tfl.nu/kt0k
  Replies (13) Good night (2966) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?

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  (508): 81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in? http://tfl.nu/31qo
  Replies (10) Good night (1578) Bad night (660)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..

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  (815): Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won.. http://tfl.nu/wk4z
  Replies (6) Good night (1544) Bad night (506)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.

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  (360): Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit. http://tfl.nu/9fav
  Replies (4) Good night (612) Bad night (1006)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.

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  (413): I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS. http://tfl.nu/290q
  Replies (1) Good night (518) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs

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  (805): It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs http://tfl.nu/6q0t
  Replies (3) Good night (657) Bad night (301)
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  (550): View more from

  She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?

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  (550): She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit? http://tfl.nu/lv25
  Replies (5) Good night (451) Bad night (175)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt

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  (270): I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt http://tfl.nu/k6gl
  Replies (1) Good night (286) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement

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  (631): I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement http://tfl.nu/k8oi
  Replies (1) Good night (331) Bad night (413)

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