Texts From Last Night

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  (518): View more from New York

  Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.

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  (518): Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight. http://tfl.nu/ukzh
  Replies (21) Good night (5289) Bad night (1328)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.

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  (910): I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive. http://tfl.nu/9t3w
  Replies (13) Good night (4541) Bad night (1114)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.

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  (318): I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning. http://tfl.nu/5etp
  Replies (4) Good night (3770) Bad night (894)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.

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  (217): I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral. http://tfl.nu/5sn1
  Replies (14) Good night (1008) Bad night (4731)
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  (631): View more from New York

  can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished

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  (631): can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished http://tfl.nu/t99v
  Replies (8) Good night (3753) Bad night (1326)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.

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  (701): Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore. http://tfl.nu/9hf8
  Replies (5) Good night (1965) Bad night (673)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?

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  (318): would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase? http://tfl.nu/h5qz
  Replies (6) Good night (1532) Bad night (1082)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.

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  (425): You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia. http://tfl.nu/758u
  Replies (7) Good night (1817) Bad night (515)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.

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  (469): After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend. http://tfl.nu/7v59
  Replies (5) Good night (1326) Bad night (525)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica

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  (740): The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica http://tfl.nu/yubm
  Replies (4) Good night (1232) Bad night (419)
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  (916): View more from California

  Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up

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  (916): Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up http://tfl.nu/2pg5
  Replies (3) Good night (619) Bad night (387)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse

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  (734): I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse http://tfl.nu/942u
  Replies (2) Good night (759) Bad night (356)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.

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  (+44): Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later. http://tfl.nu/23tp
  Replies (0) Good night (413) Bad night (364)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.

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  (248): apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week. http://tfl.nu/ax7v
  Replies (1) Good night (355) Bad night (443)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like

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  (705): its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like http://tfl.nu/rqvs
  Replies (1) Good night (331) Bad night (112)

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