I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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