we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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