I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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