yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
My vagina is very pro this idea
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
