i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Randomize
