why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize