Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize