you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
