I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
