It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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