I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
