Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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