He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
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