party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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