If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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