i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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