the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize