dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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