im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I have post one night stand depression
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