he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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