Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
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My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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