I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
